Well, Marky Mark,
You know I don't much like you but I thought I might spare a minute or two to drop a line of commiseration, from one (ex)sicko to another, if nothing else.
It's hard to believe that things have come from Gough holding the baptismal ALP chrism over your head to this, but it seems they have.
Actually, I'm inclined to agree with your mate Joel that once the election was over, everyone just wanted to put the boot in. I mean, you'd hardly been in the job ten minutes, and suddenly, everything was your fault. No wonder the old hanky-panky flared up again.
And then there was the media hounding you over your failure to produce a statement on the tsunami on your death-bed. When I heard that, I thought, obviously these people have never been seriously ill. They've never lain awake, night after night, wondering, what am I going to do if my health is fucked like this for the rest of my life? They've never found it an ordeal just to walk down to the chemist or out to the paddling pool, in your case. Though if you were really that sick, it's a wonder no one in your office had the foresight to whip up a media release and get you to sign off to it.
Tonight, those old media sour sacks have been at it again, saying you've blamed everything on them. Even on the supposedly reputable 7:30 Report. It was 'us and Mark', Mark contra media...and I thought, well, they can hardly blame you for that. In fact, I think you might be entitled to make a call for a breakdown of blame re: your career demise as follows:
Media: 70 %; Pancreas: 20 %; Mark: 10 %
I really think you can call them on that, especially after their excreable media coverage of the election. You know, how they hung round the PM's and your caravans like flies, hardly bothering to test the waters of the public's opinions, giving us a totally warped and distorted overview of what was really happening (like how the Greens were going to win a 100 seats in the House of Reps -- ha ha).
What are you going to do now, anyway? I mean, weren't you one of those career politicians, who went from stuffing envelopes in the local office to leading the Labor Party? Have you ever done anything else? Perhaps you could team up with Natasha and brainstorm on possible dayjobs for people who've never done anything except cradle-to-grave politics. Or -- now here's an idea -- set up a jobcentre for placing ex-pollies (Wingnut and Fat Amanda might be able to point you in the right direction for that funding one).
And do you think anyone really believes that politicians (even ex-pollies) really have any desire to spend any time on that cheesy family-friendly pap they're always pedalling? As a (male) colleague once said to me: 'If someone tells you they're a family man, it means they're cheating on their wife.' (What do families do anyway? I seem to remember a lot of long silences, scrabble and washing up.)
So, cheers big ears and we look forward to seeing you and Neen on Australian Story in two years' time...
When I heard that, I thought, obviously these people have never been seriously ill.
Yep, nodding my head furiously at this.
Posted by: Angus | January 19, 2005 at 08:11 PM
Yeah, yeah...
And Beazley, do we really have to have Beazley and his quadruple bypass? (I thought the one good thing we might get out of all this was Kevin Rudd.)
At least with Latham there was some chance of a different opinion to the Libs sometimes...
Whenever I get a comment from you Angus, I always think 'he must have worked his way through that incredibly long list of blogs on his site and ended up here again.'
Posted by: elsewhere | January 19, 2005 at 10:12 PM
Ha ha, no, you're a priority blog El!
Posted by: Angus | January 22, 2005 at 12:02 PM